Boundaries and consent.

• Explain a personal boundary with an everyday example.
• Demonstrate with words how to ask, listen and stop.
• Describe how to get help for yourself or a friend.

Preparation

Prepare fictional situations involving hugs, tickling and play. Practise with words and drawings. Students learn about boundaries through examples and may keep their personal experiences private. Explain what happens in each situation before introducing terminology.

Perhaps a friend would like to hug you, but you would rather wave. What you want may differ from what your friend wants. A personal boundary concerns what feels okay when someone is near you, touches you or does something with you. Other people have these boundaries too.

Ask before hugging and wait for an answer. A yes means the person wants to. If they say no, want to wait or move away, do not hug them. If someone wants to stop a game, everyone stops, even if the person is laughing while being tickled.

Someone may become frightened and silent or find it difficult to say stop. The person acting towards someone else is responsible for noticing and respecting them. An adult should help when someone experiences something unwanted. You can get an adult to help a friend too.

• What do you do when a friend would rather wave than be hugged?
• Why should tickling stop even if the person is also laughing?
• How can you get help if someone continues?

Conclude the lesson

Write or draw what you do when someone wants to stop, and identify an adult who can help.

• Explain consent as a free choice about the sexual contact taking place.
• Describe how to stop when unsure and respect a no.
• Identify safe ways to support a friend and get help.
• Know the age of consent in Norway and where to find an explanation of the rules.

Preparation

Use fictional scenarios about kissing, messages and pressure from friends. Let students discuss actions and choices through examples while keeping private experiences to themselves. Read the source on Norway's age of consent before the lesson and adapt the language to the group's prior knowledge.

Consent to sexual contact means everyone wants what is happening and chooses freely. Consent may be expressed through words or actions. You need to be sure the other person wants it. If in doubt, stop and ask. An agreement applies to what you have actually agreed to, and anyone can change their mind at any point.

A sleeping person or someone so intoxicated that they cannot understand or express what they want cannot consent. Pressure and repeated demands can remove free choice. Silence, having kissed someone before or being in a relationship does not in itself constitute consent.

The age of sexual consent in Norway is 16. Sexual intercourse with someone under 16 may be a criminal offence even if the person wants it. Where sexual contact is voluntary and both people are approximately equal in age and development, punishment may be waived. This requires assessment of the particular situation. Both consent and age therefore matter under the law.

If a friend pressures someone, you can get an adult or speak up if it is safe. You can also accompany the person who needs support to the school nurse. If you have pressured someone or committed a sexual act against their will, the behaviour must stop and you need help from a trusted adult or healthcare professional.

• What should you do if you are unsure whether the other person wants to continue?
• How can a friend challenge pressure while protecting their own and other people's safety?
• Who can help if you are concerned about your own actions?

Conclude the lesson

Write one action that respects a no and one step towards help for a friend.