Boundaries and relationships · For ages 13–17
Friends, boundaries and responsibility
You can support a friend, speak up about pressure and take responsibility for how you treat others.
It can be difficult to disagree with a group of friends. Perhaps someone keeps asking for a picture, shares private information or pressures someone into sexual contact. You can get help handling what you see. Responsibility for an assault lies with the person who commits it.
If someone is being pressured
If it feels safe, you can interrupt or ask the person whether they would like to go somewhere else with you. If the situation seems dangerous, get help rather than intervening alone. A trusted adult can help you with what comes next.
When a friend tells you something
Listen and thank your friend for telling you. You can say: 'I believe that this is difficult for you. Shall we find someone who can help?' Avoid pressing for details or taking on the role of an investigator. A friend needs support rather than having to defend their reactions.
You can offer to accompany them to a trusted adult or healthcare professional. Promise to try to help rather than to keep everything secret. If someone is in danger, adults or support services must be involved. That is a way of showing care, even if your friend finds it difficult at the time.
When images appear in a group chat
Do not share the image or show it to anyone else. You can say that the person in the image has a right to privacy. Get help from an adult if there is pressure, threats or the spread of private images.
If you are unsure about your own actions
Stop the action you are unsure about and give the other person space. Talk with an adult or school nurse about what happened. You can get help taking responsibility and changing your behaviour.
What next?
Get support to talk about it
You can start by saying: 'I am worried about something that happened to a friend.' Or: 'I am unsure whether I respected someone else's boundaries.'
Sources
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